《最接近的陌生距離》完全版 - 03

當我被電話聲嘈醒時候，已經係日上三竿。琴日放學就即刻去7-11返通宵更。最後瞓得嗰五個鐘就被電話嘈醒咗！本來我仲好迷糊，但當我見到一大串嘅未接來電之後，我成個人就醒晒。

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「未接來電﹕10 次。」

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唔洗問都知，係Miss Wong打黎啦。頂佢個肺，「廢超」執政時代係核爆都唔理架嘛！佢算老幾呀！

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睇吓鐘數，已經到咗學校Lunch時間，換言之⋯⋯嗶⋯⋯嗶⋯⋯電話又響！Miss又追魂call我！呢個女人有冇咁痴線呀？

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最後我扮睇唔到將電話掟埋一二邊算。我都讀唔成書，返學都係浪費時間，呢個星期我索性拎晒嚟返兼職，賺多少少錢仲好啦！

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但係點估到Miss Wong嘅耐性真係唔可以講笑，喺我返工期間⋯⋯唔係！佢每日係咁追魂call！煩到乜咁，我最後索性電話都唔開，睇佢點搵到我！

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幾日後嘅星期四，下午四點半。

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「先生多謝你$18.5。」我好似機械人咁逐個掃下貨品上嘅條碼

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「朱古力條做緊優惠，要唔要加$5試下？」

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「多謝你$58.5。」

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「welcome sir⋯⋯thank you sir⋯⋯bye bye⋯⋯」

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我就係好似輸入咗程式嘅機器，呢五個鐘以嚟不斷重複咁做收錢抓錢嘅動作。唉，好悶呀。喺我放緊長長嘅喊露時，我見到有個女人將本時裝雜誌放咗喺收銀枱上面。我好自然地掃下雜誌上嘅條碼。嘟——！

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「小姐，多謝你盛惠$55。易極做緊『鋪毛』, 要唔要加$5要一盒？」

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「係promote，你發音唔係好準喎。」

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我皺咗下眉，邊有客會咁樣執人口音架？最多都係話唔要唧！但係呢一把聲⋯⋯令我從沈悶嘅工作中回神過嚟。當我將目光由枱上嘅雜誌移去面前嘅女人時——

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「咁啱嘅，班長！」

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竟然係——

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「Miss⋯⋯Miss Wong?」我瞪大雙眼。

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「你咁多日冇返學，原來係返工。」佢翹起雙手，露出招牌女王式嘅睥睨眼神。

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點⋯⋯點會咁架？呢度離學校好遠架！照計唔會撞到學校老師架喎！呢個世界有冇咁細呀！定係命運安排要我呢一刻要比Miss Wong捉逃學呀？

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Miss Wong冷漠嘅面貌下嘅嘴角微微揚起笑意。

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一個充滿惡作劇嘅微笑。

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「小⋯⋯小姐盛惠$55蚊。」

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「Promote。」Miss Wong講出一口正綜又純正嘅英文：「你做服務行業唔可以hea架。」佢竟然喺呢個時候將老師角色發揮得淋漓盡致！

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「Mi⋯⋯Miss，$55，快啲比錢先啦。我會被人鬧架！」我瞄一瞄Miss Wong 身後開始出現人龍！

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Miss Wong聽到我求佢，反而更顯得寸進尺，佢微微一笑，好似好享受呢刻我嘅難受，佢就話：「跟Miss讀一次先。係Promote!」

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「鋪⋯⋯」為咗唔好比啲客鬧，我嗱嗱聲應咗MISS嘅要求就算！

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「係Pro⋯⋯」Miss Wong好似特登將個R音講得大聲啲。

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呢個時候條人龍塞到愈嚟愈長，啲人都鼓噪起嚟。頂，我好似比佢撳住嚟打咁，我唔耐煩咁講：「Pro⋯⋯」我對眼有咁大碌咁大地瞪實佢。

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　「⋯⋯mote.」Miss Wong邊笑邊講。

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「Pro⋯⋯Promote! 」

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「嘻。啱啦﹗」Miss Wong好似因為成功教訓到我而滿足咁笑。

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嘟——！八達通嘅聲音。Miss Wong比咗錢後就拎走本雜誌轉身走人，但係佢走唔夠幾步，就轉身同我講：「班長，聽日記得準時返學呀！」

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Miss Wong笑住離開，總覺得佢呢下微笑好唔簡單。

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果然，晚上九點鐘，距離收工仲有一個鐘嘅時候⋯⋯

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「你個衰仔呃我返咗學！！原來走嚟返兼職！」

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老母突然殺我一個措手不及！佢放工後走咗嚟我返工嗰度屌鳩我。老豆老母一向掛住搵食，我話乜佢地都信，點解穿咗煲架？

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「你班主任頭先打嚟同我投訴呀！你開學第二日開始逃學！仲逃足三日?！」

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老母繼續當住咁多客面前鬧我！令我勁嬲，但冇理由開阿媽拖架嘛，只係連忙咁講：「阿媽！我開緊工架！有咩返屋企再講啦！我要做嘢呀！」

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「唔讀書！冇鬼用架你！一啲都唔似你家姐！」

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阿媽佢邊走邊屌，聽到我好想爆粗搵人屌。頂你⋯⋯一日最衰係Miss Wong! 阻我搵食！唉……都仲未夠，當我收工返到屋企時，老豆原來已經返咗屋企。然後老豆老母雙劍合壁咁對我進行一小時嘅精神轟炸，最後我仲差啲同老豆打交添。

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心情差到爆，第二日繼續想逃學以表達我對呢個痴撚線Miss Wong不滿。點知老母聽晒Miss Wong話，調一調返工時間，等佢可以捉我起身返學！

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頂你個肺！新學年對我嚟講真係地獄嚟喎！我唔止冇咗課室主導權！Miss Wong仲可以迫到我返學呀！有冇輸得咁徹底呀？！

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一返到學校，第一個招呼我嘅唔係Miss Wong，係佢條仔，周Sir。

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「停低！」

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我被周Sir捉埋咗一邊，因為琴晚同老豆老母嘈完，我塊面黑過包公，可能因為咁搞到周Sir以為我串親佢。

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周Sir走埋嚟，由上而下咁打量我。佢眼神好唔友善，搞到我好唔自在。唔洗問，佢一定想捉我校服儀容啦！

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「你件校服咁污糟邋遢嘅？你係咪返學架？」佢眼神變得好厭惡，好似望到個乞衣咁，好睇唔起我。

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「Sorry Sir。」我刻意唔望佢。

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「你老母點教你，道歉要望住人架嘛。」

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洗唔洗一嚟就提老母咁串呀仆街周！

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「Sorry Sir!」

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我不忿咁望住周Sir再「道歉」一次。我以為咁樣可甩難，但呢個世界總係有啲人鍾意得寸進尺！

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「你就算有老豆老母都成個孤兒咁喎！爛身爛勢點返學呀？屋企窮到得返一件校服？」

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周sir用一個嘲笑同輕視嘅態度講呢番說話，本來我已經心情差到一個點，佢咁樣簡直就係火上加油，我即刻爆佢：「你講咩呀！而家屋企窮犯校規呀?！」

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「你件校服污糟晒就係儀容唔合格。」周Sir嘲笑我。

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「咁你未罰囉﹗」

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「罰就罰硬架啦！」然後佢行前一步，向我展示訓導嘅氣勢，目露凶光咁講：「我講咗唔好比麻煩Miss Wong架嘛。你呢幾日做咩唔返學？」

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哈，原來搞著Miss Wong，有人要幫條女出氣。

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「唔返學關唔關你事？我麻煩到Miss Wong關唔關你事呀？」

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「好啊！好夠膽喎同學！」周Sir露出令我不安嘅微笑：「我今日要隔離你。同我躝上去訓導室，等陣我就招呼你﹗」

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喺我同周Sir劍拔弩張之時，有一把聲介入咗落我同周Sir之間——「周Sir？」我應聲一睇，一身深色sult嘅Miss Wong行咗埋嚟，就話：「阿匡交比我處理就得架喇。」

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Miss Wong 語氣溫柔，與凶神惡煞嘅周Sir形成強烈對比。望見周Sir一面得戚嘅樣，似乎唔多想領情。佢繼續望實我，語帶挑釁咁講：「呢個學生冇家教架喎！佢實會蝦你。不如交比我處理啦。」

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Miss Wong再行前少少，企喺我身邊，柔聲咁同周Sir講：「呢個學生仲未同我熟唧。今次件事係個機會比我好好關心佢嘛，係咪？始終都係我班學生，等我處理返就得架啦！」佢想用親切可人嘅笑容緩和氣氛外，亦想消一消佢條仔嘅氣。果然周Sir深呼吸咗一下之後，就對Miss話：「咁佢交返比你處理。」

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Miss Wong點一點頭，就嚴厲咁同我講：「跟我嚟。」然後佢首先行前，示意我跟埋上嚟。當我行經周Sir身邊時，我地咁互瞪一下。

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我跟住Miss行，我唔知佢想帶我去邊。只知道Miss喺校務處前停低咗，轉身向我望嚟，嚴厲咁講：「入去校務處，盡返班長嘅責任！」

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「乜嘢呀？」

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「你唔記得左你係班長呀？係咪想我親自教你點做呀？」Miss Wong:「入去校務處拎點名簿同班房鎖匙！」

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可惡，換係阿Sir我一早同會死撐到底。但見係佢，我竟然乖乖咁聽佢話。到底係咩原因？係因為我怕咗佢背後撐腰嘅周Sir，定係其他原因呢？

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我萬不願意咁照Miss Wong說話做，拎齊晒佢要嘅嘢就跟佢上課室。佢一邊行一邊親自同我講班長每嘅工作係咩。我當然冇聽入耳，全部當係耳邊風啦！

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「你清楚晒班長嘅職責啦嘛？」Miss Wong嘅聲音令我回神過嚟，原來我已經跟佢返到班房。

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呢個時候Miss Wong已經坐喺老師位，翹住對黑絲腳，兩手翹埋。而我罰企喺佢身前，距離大約有四個身位。呢種距離感令好普通坐喺老師位嘅Miss Wongs有一種高高在上坐喺皇座嘅感覺。佢全身散發出女王嘅氣息，當中嘅威嚴慢慢咁輾壓過嚟。

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「你知唔知逃學係嚴重違規架？你仲要逃咗學三日咁多添。」

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呢啲明知故問嘅問題我係唔會答。我身體語言已經話比佢知我好唔滿意佢琴日阻我搵食！

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「根據校規，最少要記你一個大過。你有咩解釋？」

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唔係吓話，咁大陣仗捉我返嚟課室，就係想我兜口面認錯？我愈諗愈嬲，琴晚佢搞到我差啲同老豆打交我都仲未同佢計！仲想要我屈服？

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「你真係冇解釋？冇解釋我就真係記你大過架啦！」

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「咁你未記囉！」我最後忍唔住，向Miss Wong破口大罵：「係呀！我逃學呀！我去咗返兼職呀！滿意未呀？」

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「你學生嚟架，你做咩唔好好讀書呀？」

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「搵食犯法呀？！我想過努力讀書架！其他老師有比過機會我咩！」

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「返兼職唔係一個合理缺席嘅理由。請你好好諗清楚再同我解釋。」

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「仲解釋啲咩呀？你有眼見架嘛！我已經斷正左比你啦，你仲想我點呀？！」我怒氣已經再忍唔到落去：「我琴晚都比你搞到家嘈屋閉啦！記你就記啦！！」

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「如果我一心想罰你嘅，我就唔會浪費時間同你傾。我知你有苦衷，所以我先唔想周Sir插手。」

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「妖！你搞到我差啲同老豆打交呀！你仲扮咩好人呀？！」我瞪大對眼怒吼一聲：「我講你會聽咩？有老師會信我咩？你做例行公事就唔好晒扮關心我啦！」

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我忍無可忍！我對Miss Wong發出猛烈嘅怒吼！我要比佢知道佢再嘈我就會郁手打佢！點知——

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Miss Wong唔只冇嚇親，佢仲即刻企起身擺出強硬姿態！

只見佢仍然兩手翹起，神色好冷靜又有威嚴。明顯想大返我轉頭添﹗

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咯……咯……咯……﹗Miss Wong慢慢行過嚟，高踭鞋嘅聲音喺課室顯得異常響亮，而且更帶有高傲冷漠嘅氣息。佢每向我行前一步，我就好自然咁向後退。Miss Wong嗰種女王嘅氣勢完完全全咁向我輾壓過嚟！最後我被佢迫到去課室門前，我一粒聲都唔敢出。

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「⋯⋯」Miss Wong唔出聲咁望住我，佢表情冷若冰霜，眼神好堅定。

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咦？換係平時，呢個時候我已經同老師開晒大片。呢刻課室得返我同佢，環境係靜到得返我地嘅呼吸聲。我係一個堂堂一個男子漢，身型比佢大隻，真係打佢都仲得添！但偏偏Miss Wong竟然一啲都唔驚我！而且仲要唔出聲咁望住我，咁樣反而令我慌寸大亂。搞到我被迫同佢四目交投。片刻，我個注意力由佢一雙清澈嘅眼睛慢慢轉移到佢整個樣貌。

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剎那間，我內心突然有一種壓唔住嘅感覺——

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——Miss Wong真係好靚。

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原來Miss Wong嬲嘅時候，皺晒眉頭嘅樣係咁靚，令佢女王嘅屬性一下子爆升！

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咦⋯⋯咦？！咪……咪住先，我⋯⋯我做緊咩呀？我個心跳得好快！我⋯⋯我唔係要鬧爆佢咩？！平時呢啲時候我一定有主導權架喎！啲老師會買我怕架喎！

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唔得！我唔可以再比佢迷惑嘅！我⋯⋯我望去第二度先！

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「望住我！」Miss Wong突然厲聲一喝，嚇咗我一跳，令我好自覺咁望返佢。

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我見到Miss Wong上面嘅怒意慢慢消失，冷漠地說：「你發完脾氣未呀？」唔知點解，聽落佢似想關心我嘅？

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吓？佢唔係應該要鬧我架咩？做咩又會對我溫柔起嚟架？以前啲老師一係同我片到落尾，一係就索性認輸架喎？！

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呢個時候，我留意到Miss Wong原來一早準備好咗一個file。當我見佢將file拎上手睇時，我先發現原來佢睇緊我個學生行為紀錄。呢份紀錄好似案底咁，會由中一開始一直跟到我畢業。唔洗問都知，Miss Wong想數晒我由中一起犯過嘅校規。

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只見佢念念有詞細閱片刻，就放低個file，一面威嚴冷漠咁望住我。我已經知道有唔好嘅事情將要發生，於是做定同佢開片準備。

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點知⋯⋯

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「係咪好耐都冇人關心過你呀？」Miss Wong面色一變，柔聲咁講。

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吓？!佢唔係應該要數我啲過錯咩？

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以前既日子，除咗「廢超」唔鳩理我之外，呢間學校所有老師都當我仇人咁。當我一比佢地罰，佢地就會由咸豐年講返我衰過啲咩，最後就會得出「睇死謝子匡遲早入黑社會架啦！」、「今年你一定留硬班！」、「快啲踢佢出校啦！」呢啲結論。

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老實講，我習慣晒，心都傷晒，最後心都硬埋起嚟。

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我讀書讀得好唔開心，但即使係咁都好，老豆老母都唔幫我搞退學。既然係咁，我就同老師玩野，犯下錯之餘又識得守返規，係都唔比佢地有藉口趕到出校。成績上就掹下車邊搏升班。總之我死都要留低喺度篤眼篤鼻。因為佢地真係好令我討厭。佢地用我嘅行為定罪，佢地……佢地冇一個人會關心我呀﹗

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咦‥‥?！諗到呢度，我個心有一種好奇怪既感覺。我以為一早對老師心死，但呢一刻又好似有返少少感覺，難道係因為……Miss Wong剛才既一句說話?

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佢知我冇人關心。

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佢知我其實好想有人關心。

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佢知我最想既係——

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「你最想係父母關心你。」.

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Miss Wong慢慢變得溫柔起嚟。

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我吃驚到唔識比反應！Miss Wong察覺到我放鬆起嚟，於是佢慢慢退返後，然後半挨半坐左喺老師枱度，柔聲咁講：「頭先我睇返你既行為紀錄，每次訓導想約見你家長時，佢地都以返工為理由而嚟唔到。我諗佢地平時都好難關心到你。」

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「屋企窮呀嘛，老豆老母要搵食，慣晒架啦。」

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「其實你犯既事都唔算太嚴重。我相信你本身唔係一個壞學生，可惜冇人明白你既本質。阿匡，你一直以嚟用對抗老師嘅方式嚟發洩不滿，其實只會令老師更加誤解你。」Miss Wong停一停，佢用一雙睇穿左我心事既眼神凝望住我。

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咩話？

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Miss Wong好似講中咗我埋藏左好耐既心事。原本被學校傷到好剛硬既心，都好似因為Miss Wong既聲音、說話、同理心而慢慢軟化起黎。

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「琴晚點解差D同爸爸打交既?」

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原本我想答佢「一日都係你搞成我咁」。但我竟然咁講﹕「因為佢誤解我。」

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或者，我不知不覺間真係比Miss Wong感動到。我唔想連惟一願意關心我既人都趕走埋。於是我喺呢份感動之下，我好放心咁向佢披露埋藏喺心底既事。

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我屋企經濟條件好差，唔好話玩具，我連校服都係得一件咋。老豆為左我同家姐可以生活得好D，佢要一個人打兩份工。老豆係做保安，每晚七點先收工。然後佢就即刻返房訓幾個鐘，再喺凌晨時份起身到超市做執貨。老豆一做就做到朝早七點，然後就返日頭嘅工。因為咁樣，我由細到大都好似冇老豆咁，惟一令我可以見到老豆既時候，就係我半夜去痾夜尿時，見到老豆一個人好孤獨咁食緊飯。我同老豆之間好似有堵牆咁，每當凌晨見佢一個人食飯時，我都好想去關心吓佢。

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「早啲瞓覺，聽日返學。」但當我上埋去時，老豆只掉低呢句好冷漠嘅說話，然後佢就出門去返第二份工。

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父母為口奔馳，佢地為咗我同家姐犧牲咗好多嘢，唔只係青春同時間，甚至差少少犧牲埋佢地嘅夫妻關係。更加犧牲咗我同父母嘅關係，我唔憎佢地，但我已經唔再識得同佢地傾計。

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「點解要咁唧﹗」講到我同父母嘅關係時，我個心就唔知點解會好嬲，向Miss Wong激動咁講﹕「點解佢地要為我同家姐犧牲咁多嘢啊!」

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Miss Wong冇回應我，只係好留心咁聽我呻。

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「我同老豆老母就嚟唔識得點出溝通，一開口就嗌交。一開口佢就鬧我一啲都唔似家姐咁生性！我⋯⋯我⋯⋯」再講落去我會頂唔順流馬尿，所以我就停左落嚟等自己冷靜一下先。

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「我明白啦。」Miss Wong溫柔咁講。

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「嗯？」

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「你唔想父母再為你犧牲，所以你想返兼職照顧好自己。」Miss Wong溫暖咁微笑：「你唔只需要佢地關心，更希望你地關係唔再受經濟問題所影響。」

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我都未講，佢點解會知架？

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「所以，你琴晚同父母爭執，就係因為佢地唔明白你呢份心意。」

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Miss Wong把可人既聲音，好似敲鐘咁敲醒咗我! 我內心漸漸熱起嚟，係一份莫名嘅感動。

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「冇人明白自己嘅感覺係好難受。連最親嘅人都唔明白、唔關心，再加上誤解就令你更難受!」

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我望住Miss成個人呆晒。然後我雙眼突然好熱又濕……我唔知咩事，只係知呢個係一個久違既情緒反應，令我好自然咁垂低頭，唔想比Miss Wong見到我呢個樣。

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我記得琴晚同父母炒大鑊時，佢地鬧我返工係為咗追波鞋、手機。我個心係痛到裂開。但係呢一刻……我個心好暖，好似冇咁痛。被人關心、被人明白……就係呢種感覺？

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我眼前一切都化開，焦點都散渙起嚟。過咗一陣我先知，原來我喊緊。呢個時候正在垂低頭既我注視緊d地板，想好好冷靜落嚟。然後我聽到響咗幾下高踭鞋聲，一隻纖白又修長既手拎住張紙巾遞咗埋嚟。

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我一抬頭，我好似被溫暖嘅陽光照射住。

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「愛錫父母都算係合理嘅逃學理由嚟嘅。」

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「今次我唔會記你大過！」

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她的笑，帶住憐憫同體恤。

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「下次就冇得傾架啦。知唔知？」

Miss Wong將個紙巾向我再遞前一Ｄ，想我好好擦乾D眼淚。

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我仍然呆晒咁唔識反應，呢十幾年嚟冇一個老師會咁樣關心我。

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但佢會。

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Ｍiss Wong ，黃梓盈老師……佢真係好特別。

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佢特別到令我嬲佢唔落，憎佢唔到。

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甚至佢特別令我——

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——咦？﹗呢種感覺係——？﹗

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