Chapter VIII: Batchmates, Part 2
The program almost becomes boring since it's speaker after speaker. Another thing is, there's no activeness in the voices of each speaker. I feel the urge of wanting to go now, so as our Class Vice Mayor and his friends. We stand up from the bleachers, and make our way towards the exit. However, unlike my previous school that one can freely leave, it's the opposite. As I said a while back, criminology students stand firm and bold against the door, making sure nobody gets out. They might be following the rule, "Once you get in, you will finish it". So we remain near the doors. Another criminology student (possibly a senior), approaches the other criminology students at the door, telling them that no students should remain near the doors. Thus, we go back to the bleachers.
Then, as the program concludes, we all go out of the gymnasium. We scramble out like a herd of cows out of a pen.
As we pass by the College of Health Sciences building, I happen to pass by Zen. Zen was one of my classmates in Special STEM. I call his name and he notices me. He waves back and call my name too with a smile.
On such occasions, I often see the others, mostly nursing, especially during the Field Demonstration practices for the SCUAA-1 (State Colleges and Universities Athletic Association – Region 1). However, there are some times that I'm too shy to call their names, especially the girls. Even since I broke up with the Maldita, I had maintained some of my social aspects, but my introverted-ness protrudes. I admit that I'm a shy kinda timid person. I did not get along well with girls back then, but even though I miss to be with them (my Special STEM classmates) in general, I wanted to make it up to them.
We cannot undo our acts anymore like a computer where you can just click Ctrl+Z, it's the real world. Looking back, I learned that moments matter the most, and one can't reverse the action anymore. If there's a question to be asked, and that would be,
"How can we reverse our actions if so?"
The answer is, we can't since it's already done. I might saying in a grammatical context, but it's also realism. Our reality is moving forward, and if the concept of time travel within a science-fiction is possible, then it can be played backward then reversed until a new reality is fabricated.
As for me, the only thing I need to do now, is to make it up to them. I can't think of anything else, but with free will, our decision has been given light. We have the audacity to pick the wrong decision, then we regret it afterwards. For those who are going back to their past, I can confirm that it's not a crazy idea. Some people might think it's crazy to trace back your past since it's already done. Then let me you, what about history? If I would give a good example, there are three books, Noli Me Tangere, El Filibusterismo, and Les Miserables. You might think these books I picked one might say all about liberation and revolution, but it's the one I'm shedding light to. Like other books, we study these books just as we examine art. Through the different planes such as the Iconic, Axiological, Semiotic, and Contextual, truths and opinions are revealed from the artwork about their past. What the author feels, and his/her thought. What was the purpose or why they did the artwork. Same as the books we read with more context. That is the same impression we have when we learn about our past, or study I should say. We study our past, if what did we do, what were the hobbies we did. That is a chance and process to know yourself more and more clarified. It is also the reason why we study history because without history, we don't know how we came to be.
Teachers should often teach the history of a subject not just to bore or decorate it, but to give a small background of what the students will learn. We learn the history, not just a place but ourselves too. Learning and studying what you did, what you do, and what will you do will make you better understand the self.
I never went to a class full of adventures than the Special STEM. I never had a class much more memorable than my former class. My former class, I didn't know it was a thrill to be with them when I was with them. But that when I saw the truth when I had broken the blindfolds off. Seeing the light, breaking free from her dictatorship, is the easement a slave and those who are feeling same deserves.
My classmates were right, and I was wrong. Without them, my Highschool life would have been dull. Unfortunately, due to the purple blindfold that made me bled to a broken state, I didn't see it through. I hope, they will never see me as the same Mar back then when I was blindfolded. I really do miss them.
I never had the chance to say it to them while we were still whole, but now, as I ponder, I see that I missed the chance to say so. If I would have a chance, maybe at the reunion.
On group projects with my current classmates, I begin to picture out the differences between Special STEM and BSCE. However, its summative context, it picture us back then, working no playing while vibing to music all 18 of us. Compared to now, 40+ or something, some playing and laughing, but I would still picture the good old class that made tearful to my realization. Highschool batchmates are still the GOAT (Greatest Of All Time), than the current. My feeling to them is not like any other and my heart felt calm. For the BSCE, even though I'm not Class Mayor anymore, I'm still adjusting to them. In layman's term, I'm still understanding their mood.
Looking at the props my BSCE classmates have done, I'm almost tearful and about to break. It reminds me of those times me and my Special STEM classmates have done. To my Special STEM classmates reading this, shoutout to all of you there, wherever you are, know that I cared, and I miss all of you.
With that, I reminisce, I go back, I reflect, but something things are still missing. I wonder what those might be.
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