What is a letter/note you've always wanted to give to a loved one but never had the courage to? - “A Love That Was Never Mine to Keep”

There’s something I’ve carried for years.36Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8VuYFAd210
Something I never had the courage to say — not even when I sat beside you every single day, not even when your voice was the only comfort I knew.

We were best friends.36Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnznFTfhRob
You let me in, shared your secrets, laughed with me, cried with me, made memories that stretched across years.36Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPRpnPlDM6N
And I held them all like tiny treasures.

But somewhere along the way…36Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhNJ5tv4bvH
I fell in love with you.

Not in a loud, dramatic way.36Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2KtzFpSe3w
Not in a way that ever asked for anything back.36Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYzaImQy5gK
I just… loved you.

In the quietest, deepest corners of my soul.36Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlJm7ewvHXz
In the spaces between your words.36Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOJLHEt6Ifx
In the silence after your voice.36Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡG9QPCwjYEL
In the warmth of every “pagal” you called me.

I listened when you spoke about her — the girl you liked.36Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWqo6yqHXr0
I helped you find the words, plan the replies, understand your feelings.36Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK4l0EOhjxx
And with each sentence I gave to help you be closer to her…36Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5KGvNklTEN
I lost a little piece of myself.

Because I wasn’t just your friend.36Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSOy9lYkfNQ
I was the one who stayed up late, not to talk — but to overthink every conversation we had.36Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlxdMjOgLAz
I was the one who replayed your voice in my mind when everything felt heavy.36Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHj51qnohK2
I was the one who watched you choose others — and still smiled, like it didn’t hurt.

But Zuni, it did.36Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7O5HYH29gh
It hurt more than you’ll ever know.

The world saw you as the strong one. The admired one.36Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOtHxNl3eEM
But I saw something softer — something only I got to know.36Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFjbytkSW91
Your laughter that came after anger.36Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYERcZOIPAl
The way you forgot things but remembered how to make people feel loved.36Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqKmvxQfRBI
The way you chose me, again and again, when others wanted your time — and I thought, just maybe, that meant something.

I remember the night I sent you that video…36Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYsI6oJFrlF
That baby crying, and the words:36Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRyYTXNhssA
“No one ever says they miss me…”

And you replied —36Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡe2mINav7MA
“Pagal… you are always missed. Always remembered.”

Zuni…36Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡScoBCk6RDi
You didn’t know, but I broke that night.36Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjAdj7GdXnM
Because that was the closest I ever came to hearing what I had waited years to hear.36Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRZl0orPnmV
And it still wasn’t what I needed.

The truth is, you never knew what I carried inside.36Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKcMhdRE6rx
How every word I said was soaked in feelings I buried.36Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ59fzM4eHLC
How every smile I gave hid the pain of being almost everything to you…36Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKTUlYwxHxZ
But never the one thing I wanted to be.

We still talk.36Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5pyEPNImCj
Every day.36Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaiS9VBN0ij
Like everything is fine.36Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtRcsDiPezw
Like there’s no storm behind the screen.

But every message I send is a love letter written in disguise.36Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpSjluuf1qe
Every reply is me pretending that “friend” was ever enough.

And you’ll never know.36Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfzMYWntFAU
Because I will never tell you.36Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡI4OyqU7sR6
Not because I’m afraid —36Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ36zmOJb9FF
But because I love you too much to ruin the only place I exist in your life.

Maybe Allah never wrote your heart for me.36Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtjlPghJtzk
Maybe I was just meant to love you from the edge of your world… and pray for you from a distance.

So I do.

I pray that you are always happy.36Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8yqgP4B00v
That your heart is always full.36Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsIA30IlPad
That the person you choose gives you every joy I once dreamed of giving you.36Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPcJCwmxo8j
And I pray — selfishly, quietly — that if you ever wonder if someone truly loved you without asking for anything…36Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXiZjVzBCwn
You’ll think of me.

Not as the friend who stayed.36Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡd5ddb65ZA4
But as the heart that broke —36Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeuZ3lvb8GM
And still kept loving.

Always,36Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPsk52zc2BE
your friend...................36Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡa0mz6aGAAa
—The girl who never told you. But always meant it.

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