[1] "This Damn Company's Boss... Is the Goddess's Electronic Pet?!"
Crouched in the ventilation shaft above the CEO's office, Hoshino and I stared down at the "boss" charging below—
His suit split open, revealing a pink rabbit-shaped mechanical core stamped with:460Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡh7HG4LpQsf
[Model: Goddess's Beloved Pet #996460Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqOIO7uqn2b
Functions: Faith Extraction / Employee Brainwashing / Automatic Frisbee Fetching]
"Three hundred years ago..." Hoshino's voice trembled, "that woman said she wanted 'a healing pet'... and this is what she made?!"
My familiar wriggled through the duct, its phone screen lighting up with the unlocked "Goddess Cloud Drive":460Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2PEYG9U60c
"Your Majesty! Found the blackmail files! Just ¥500 to—"460Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpGn3LJshFc
"BUY IT!!" we shouted in unison.
[2] Blackmail File 001: The Goddess Can't Actually Code
The first decompressed file:460Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXrbLgWf2Gn
[Heaven System Source Code (Annotated)]
460Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡow14CyfB7l
def exploit_humans(): 460Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcb7MEYWKQU
if employee.emotion == "despair": 460Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQhxLgLkajB
print("Work hard! Heaven awaits next year!") # LIES. No such feature. 460Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdUXRcosv5Y
else: 460Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHP1un3AyQ1
activate("holy_gaslighting_module") # NOTE: Outsourced to Hell.
460Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWfJV56ucP9
460Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUSDhP7qydE
460Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhIxQvHXFrl
"Hold up!" I yanked my familiar's tail. "Since when did demons take these kinds of jobs?!"460Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡh4DjzqLusV
Hoshino deadpanned: "Remember? You said, 'Let’s earn side income from Goddess contracts'..."
[3] Blackmail File 007: Holy Swords Are Just Plungers
A leaked video played—460Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡC2wfxOilqW
Younger Goddess haggled at a heavenly hardware store:460Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0BmM6spGCh
"Just plate this toilet plunger in gold, add LED lights... Yeah, make it look like a 'Holy Sword'!"460Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡckQashJM9z
Clerk: "You still owe us for turning the Roomba into 'angel halos'..."
Hoshino’s sword flickered like faulty Christmas lights.460Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzvXVzzBryT
"No wonder..." she monotone’d, "it keeps showing 'Low Battery' when I stab you."
[4] Company-Wide Riot! When the Wage Slaves Learn the Truth
The moment we mass-emailed the blackmail files, chaos erupted—
Accounting Dept. folded overtime forms into paper airplanes bombarding the CEO's office.
IT Dept. hacked the "faith conversion" backend, setting everyone’s "ascension progress" to 100%.
Janitor Auntie charged the coffee machine with a mop: "My daughter’s overwork data was in THIS?!"
"Now!" Hoshino flung off her HR badge. "Go dismantle that 'pet rabbit' and reclaim your Demon Core—"
Alarms blared:460Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrGZgM92QOz
[WARNING: Mass Awakening Detected. Initiating FINAL PROTOCOL: Full System Reset.]
Ceiling panels shattered, unleashing chains that lashed toward employees. The rabbit CEO’s eyes glowed blood-red:460Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRjQxQieNsv
"Naughty workers... become batteries~❤"
[5] Demon King & Hero’s Ultimate Fusion Move (Literal)
"Five seconds!" Hoshino tossed me her holy sword. "Channel your dark energy into it—"460Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJAh6fuHjiu
The hilt scorched my palm: "This thing isn’t dark-magic-compatible?!"460Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡda10CUdrOY
"Shut up!" She gripped my sword-hand. "Our ceasefire pact said '50% holy, 50% dark'—"
The blade erupted in gold-and-black lightning. My familiar livestreamed:460Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcEXWItTQrV
"Ladies and gentlemen! Presenting the legendary combo move officially named—"
『S O C I A L D E A T H S L A S H』!!!
ns216.73.216.217da2
→ Request update
and then Add to home screen.